The Prayer

While out with Fred the other evening I was, as usual, cogitating on topics to post about.  I had started putting ideas together about something, but then out of the blue, this prayer came to mind, so I thought I'd share it instead.  =)

"O Lord, support us all the day long, until the shadows lengthen and the evening comes, and the busy world is hushed, and the fever of life is over, and our work is done.  Then in Thy mercy grant us a safe lodging, and a holy rest, and peace at the last.  Amen."

Have you heard it before?  Isn't it so beautiful?  For me, it's one of those things that is so poignantly beautiful it nearly makes me want to weep every time I hear it.  I'm sure you have those things too.  You know what I mean---something that when you hear it/see it it gives you goosebumps or a thrill or makes you want to cry.  Sometimes it's a song, or a poem, or a story. Or maybe it's a place of special meaning---like the Tomb of The Unknown Soldier or the Statue of Liberty.   Personally, I have quite a few!  And this prayer is one of them.  I'm not exactly sure why this prayer does it for me more than others, but I think it has a great deal to do with how I first heard it.   My Uncle Charles.  He was the first person I heard to pray this prayer, and every time I hear or read it, it is my Uncle Charles' voice that I hear.  He didn't just read it, like so many words on a page.  He spoke it, like poetry in motion,  words devoutly changing from black to color right in front of you. He made them mean something.  I can't say what I see in my mind when I hear these words.  It's rather like an elusive dream that is there, and is familiar, but can't be put into words.  Know what I mean?  However,  I can tell you there is poignancy and warmth there---like years and years of past graces received all tied into today's communication and devotion to God.  Like praying this prayer that so many faithful have prayed before me not only lets me communicate with God, but also, somehow, ties me to the devout ones who have gone before me.  Does that make sense?  It feels like maybe what the hymn writer meant when he penned "mystic sweet communion with those whose rest is won".  There is some kind of sharing there.  I can't explain it, but I feel it.  There is history in this prayer---the history of those who have tried and found God's graces to be sure, of those who have depended on Him as the answer for Everything.  There is hope in it too.  Hope that, since the faithful before me have made it through to "peace at the last", I can also.  It's amazing how just a few short words, devoutly written---devoutly spoken, can mean all of that.   But they do.  Thank you, Uncle Charles, for bringing them to life for me.

A Home Without Fear

I wanted to post something for Father's Day, but alas, did not manage it.  However, we don't have to relegate posts about good fathers to one day in the year do we?  So.  Here goes.

As an adult I see blessings differently than I did as a child.  Or maybe I should say I see different blessings.  As a child there are the basics: hugs, food, warm bed.  As an adult, those blessings become expanded and more complex.  Food involves money and job and budgeting and you begin to realize all that goes into providing for a family.  This goes for the warm bed as well.  When you are the one responsible for the job and bill paying you become much more aware of what your parents gave and sacrificed to provide a good home in which to grow up.  But one of the blessings I have been thinking of lately concerns the character of my parents, particularly my dad.  I hear horror stories about children growing up in homes where they are abused in all kinds of ways, sometimes even killed, and again and again I am reminded of the blessing of having a True Christian father.  I say "True" Christian, because there are men who profess to be "Christian" and still carry out the most unspeakable abuse against their children.  Hence the necessity of the distinction.  I never, ever had to live in fear about my dad coming home from work (unless I had been bad! And then it wasn't really fear, just not wanting punishment! lol).  I didn't have to worry if he would beat me or my sisters or my mother, whether he would be drunk, whether he would bring home others who would do who-knows-what to me.  The older I get and the more horrific stories I hear, the more I realize just how blessed I was.  I can't imagine what some children go through on a daily basis, or the kind of fear they live with every moment.  I am grateful I never had to experience that.  So this Father's Day (and every day, really) I say "Thanks Dad! (and Mom too!)" for the blessing of a home without fear.

It's been too long.  Yes, I know this. Obviously my April challenge faltered midway through!  The problem with trying to blog every day, for me at least, is that after a week or so it is no fun anymore.  Instead of an outlet for creativity, it becomes another stressor---something I really don't need!  So I just quit.  There.  I said it.  =)  The trouble with quitting on something like a blog (or a diet!), is that it is hard to get back into it.  There has been an ongoing post list in my head, but somehow just not the impetus there to begin again.  So there went April......and May.......and here we are into June (and nearly halfway through that, I might add!).  You might be wondering, why now?  What gave me that final push to give it another heave-ho?  A friend posted to his blog after 2 years of being MIA.  2 years!  So see, there is hope for me!  =)  He said that even though there were many other things in his life that he loved, he really missed writing.  Something in me resounded with that.  It's strange that even though trying to keep a blog and do everything else I enjoy sometimes stresses me, when I don't do it I miss it.  So I'm not sure how to schedule everything, but having a blog is definitely something I want in my life.  I never thought I would like writing, but as it turns out, I do.  I have no idea what that means in terms of regularity of posting---probably not much different that it has in the past! lol  Don't look for a post every day by any means.   But I really want to try to cram some writing in, in between sewing bags and dyeing towels and making cheese and crocheting and pinning and essential oil potion making and card-making and knitting and gardening and long dates with Fred.  Oh, and work too.......Oy!